Chapter 9 of 10All chapters
Chapter 9 of 10
Relationships
Repair over perfection.
What predicts durability
Research on couples finds that how disagreements are handled matters more than how often they happen. Contempt is the most damaging single behaviour.
- Repair after a rupture matters more than avoiding ruptures.
- Assuming good intent before responding prevents most escalation.
Listening
Being understood is what most people want before being helped. Summarising someone's point back is the cheapest and most underused relationship skill.